有過去的女人 - 值不值同佢一起?

ovaries

Hi fellow readers,

Sorry this is in English, but it will take me whole night to type in Chinese. I can read Chinese so please reply anyway you want.

My situation is that my wife passed away last year, leaving me with children. I am looking after the children well, plus working full time, but in the long term I am looking to remarry.

After being married for 15 years it is not easy to return to the dating scene. I am youthful for my age (mid 40's) and working as professional job with good income. Despite all these, not many women are exactly interested. I have been meeting different women with different backgrounds. I have kept an open mind so far.

Would you consider going out with a woman who had 3 men in her life already? I mean first one she lived with him for >5 years, second one for 3 years and third unknown time spent together. She is still "single" as she never formally married. But for all intent she is like had 2-3 marriage living like that.

I find it difficult as my first love was the opposite. We were both each other's first partner.

However the present woman does have some good point: reasonably pretty, cultured, taste and smart. I am somehow attracted to her for the wrong reasons. But then again, if a woman is not married in their late 30's already what type of people can I expect to meet?


She sees me for outings but says that she had never been in a situation where the man has children and find it a bit difficult to mix in.

Just not sure I should really keep "chasing" her or keep looking for someone with a better background. Not sure if I spend all my effort to offer her a great life then live to regret about my choice.

Thanks for comments.

tmau

a) 要管家婆或女友, 要求是不同的!

b) 女方要顧及小孩, 態否應付?

c) 小孩對繼母有甚麼不良反應!?

ovaries

I want a lover not a house manager. Of course a little help from her would be good but I am OK looking after them.

She has said that she never had children to care for and is a new challenge.

Of course it is always difficult for children to accept new people in house.

The more I think about it, it is not an easy task for a woman to enter into this relationship... has to be someone who is really special.

donjuan

有冇...中文版本..

tmau

a) girl friend and wife are two different things! define what you need first

b) does she ready to look after the kids? have u find out the solution suppose she is your destiny?

c) your duty for her migration. team them up

笨小馬

誰人沒過去呀?

你揀人, 人揀你...

ovaries

又同她出了去聽音樂, 之後又談下心.

她被上一個男友飛咗, 重好傷.

她現在當我是一位可以傾談出街的男性朋友, 或者是大哥 (多七歲).

她最近開始入不敷出, 我想幫, 但她又不要.

覺得佢好可憐, 這樣美麗的女人應該是被人當作寶, 但仍是單身, 找不到她的真愛.

算啦, 當佢紅顏知己先至算.

tmau

五時花六時變, 都不知道你想點!

想起莎翁在羅密歐與茱麗葉劇中之說話: 男人如你這般沒恆心, 休怪女人們朝三暮四

ovaries

而家係我有心, 佢仲末有感覺, 但沒有拒絕.

所以不想自討沒趣, 等多一時再算.

tmau

a) 如你沒說漏, 感覺有點不對

b) 男人不要乾等, 戀上她便助她走出谷底

c) 兩本書: 1) Wake Up On Time; 2) 男女大不同

d) 祝君好運

原帖由 ovaries 於 2009-9-28 21:19 發表

                               
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而家係我有心, 佢仲末有感覺, 但沒有拒絕.

所以不想自討沒趣, 等多一時再算.

大傻哥

if you think you only need a lover rather than a wife, you can try to chase her just because she's pretty
but i would like to emphasis one thing: that's your children
as a father of your kids, you should better put your kids in your first place to choose a right woman. otherwise, you will taste the bitter fruit in the future.

ovaries

Thanks. Ideally I want to find a nice (outside and inside) woman who will also get on well with my children.

Not easy, it will take someone with a big, generous heart.

ElderBrother

[小弟多事, 嘗試翻譯一下]

Hi fellow readers, 各位讀者老友

Sorry this is in English, but it will take me whole night to type in Chinese. I can read Chinese so please reply anyway you want.
很抱歉用英文版, 但若用中文版恐怕我整晚才能打完本文, 我能讀中文, 故請回應時中英隨意!

My situation is that my wife passed away last year, leaving me with children. I am looking after the children well, plus working full time, but in the long term I am looking to remarry.
我現在的處境是太太已於去年逝世, 留下了孩子給我, 我一面全職工作, 幸好仍能妥善地照顧孩子, 但長遠計仍得重找對象再婚!

After being married for 15 years it is not easy to return to the dating scene. I am youthful for my age (mid 40's) and working as professional job with good income. Despite all these, not many women are exactly interested. I have been meeting different women with different backgrounds. I have kept an open mind so far.
都已婚十五年了, 很難再回到拍拖的情景, 在約45歲的中年來說我仍算年輕力壯, 且是專業人士收入頗佳, 雖然條件如此, 但仍不是有很多女士對我有興趣的! 我已找過很多不同背景不同類型的女人, 我仍得抱著開放的態度!

Would you consider going out with a woman who had 3 men in her life already? I mean first one she lived with him for >5 years, second one for 3 years and third unknown time spent together. She is still "single" as she never formally married. But for all intent she is like had 2-3 marriage living like that.
你們會否考慮一個曾經有過3個男人的女人做對象? 第一位男士跟她一起超過5年, 第二位則3年, 第三位則不詳, 這女人現在仍是單身，因她從沒正式結過婚, 但看來她好像喜歡2~3年的同居婚姻模式!

I find it difficult as my first love was the opposite. We were both each other's first partner.
我感到很困惑, 因我已逝的太太跟她是完全相反類型的, 我跟太太相互都是第一個婚姻伙伴!

However the present woman does have some good point: reasonably pretty, cultured, taste and smart. I am somehow attracted to her for the wrong reasons. But then again, if a woman is not married in their late 30's already what type of people can I expect to meet?
但是, 現在這位女士當然也有她的優點: 相當可愛, 有知識和教養, 有品味及醒目! 我被她吸引了是為著某種不當的原因, 但是就一位30多歲仍沒有結婚的女人來說, 你能祈望她是個怎樣的人?

She sees me for outings but says that she had never been in a situation where the man has children and find it a bit difficult to mix in.
她經常跟我在外面約會, 但她說從沒跟一位有孩子的男人在一起, 感覺很難融入其中!

Just not sure I should really keep "chasing" her or keep looking for someone with a better background. Not sure if I spend all my effort to offer her a great life then live to regret about my choice.
真的不知應否繼續追求她, 或是去找另一個背景較好的女人, 因為我不能肯定若選擇付出給她，讓她人生過得好了, 但會否卻給自已的人生帶來遺憾?

Thanks for comments.
多謝回覆意見!



[ 本帖最後由 ElderBrother 於 2009-10-14 19:33 編輯 ]