New Terminology

plo63

The following terms have acquired new meaning in this financial crisis:-

CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer.

CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.

BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.

VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.

P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.

BROKER -- What my broker has made me.

STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.

STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.

FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.

CASH FLOW-- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.

YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.

WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Citigroup @ $50+ per share.

INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.

PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use.

三叔

add to the list :

WALL STREET -- street with walls for you to hit heads on

LEHMAN BROTHERS -- your brothers for over 150 years  and dead in 2008

BONUS -- paid as long as you worked for AIG

plo63

原帖由 三叔 於 2009-3-29 20:45 發表

                               
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add to the list :

WALL STREET -- street with walls for you to hit heads on

LEHMAN BROTHERS -- your brothers for over 150 years  and dead in 2008

BONUS -- paid as long as you worked for AI ...

I like your additions, very nice  

plo63

add to the list:

MOODY's -- you will become moody if you rely on their rating reports

RATING AGENCY -- an organization that uses "rats" to go about their business  [Yahoo On-line dictionary defines a rat as "A despicable person"]